Category: K.E.E.N. skills

Why you Should Seek Change Energy in Emotion – not in Analytics

“There is no energy in logic, only in emotion” – Dee Pinkard. I like how this quote reminds us that the root of e-motion is indeed motion as in moving. Emotions are actual states which move us – physically.

Emotion is energy in motionThe quote also reminds us that logic or analytic thinking in itself does not really produce movement. In particular if you want to foster some kind of change, or to bring people to take some kind of initiative, the only truthful way is to create emotions. Convincing through clever analytics very rarely creates any kind of subsequent action.

As proven repeatedly by marketing experts, negative emotions do work powerfully when they deal with our fear of loss; positive emotions do work as well when it comes to sharing a compelling vision.

If you want something to move, you need to create emotions. Emotions are energies in motion. Release the energy – create emotions!

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Why You Should Try to Belong (and Not so much to Fit-In)

There is a distinct difference between fitting-in and belonging, and this changes completely how we deal with situations where we try to enter a group.

fitting-in or belonging?“Fitting in and belonging are not the same thing, and, in fact, fitting in gets in the way of belonging. Fitting in is about assessing a situation and becoming who you need to be to be accepted. Belonging, on the other hand, doesn’t require us to change who we are; it requires us to be who we are.” – Brene Brown in ‘The Gifts of Imperfection‘.

According to Brene, belonging requires authenticity (and including acceptance of our imperfections) while fitting-in is an attempt to disguise ourselves to enter a group. The latter is obviously, on the long run, due to fail or at least put us in a quite uncomfortable position, which can sometimes lead to psychological consequences.

It is great to belong – although possibly difficult and rare. Do not try to fit-in at all costs believing that it is the same. It is not, and it is very uncomfortable. So right now, do you belong or do you fit-in?

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Why Excellence should be a Consistent Attitude

“If you are going to achieve excellence in big things, you develop the habit in little matters. Excellence is not an exception, it is a prevailing attitude” – so says Colin Powell. Like other things, excellence seems to be what you should do when others are not looking!

quote-Colin-Powell-if-you-are-going-to-achieve-excellenceWhat I find interesting in this quote is how is could be misinterpreted as for some people, the line is extremely fine between excellence and perfectionism. And if perfectionism is applied to everything including the things, it can obviously be a quite counter-productive behavior.

According to Wikipedia, “excellence is a talent or quality which is unusually good and so surpasses ordinary standards”. Colin Powell thus suggests that we should develop an attitude that seeks to always surpass normal standards, even by a little – and not be satisfied by the ordinary in all circumstances.

That is a tough standard, still Colin Powell is probably right to suggest that it is only by being relentless seeking excellence in all aspects that one will also become excellent in large endeavors. In my experience, excellence in executing large projects is a close attention to detail and excellence in all aspects of execution.

Be relentless seeking excellence. And you’ll achieve great things.

Credits: I found this great quote on Lifehack from where the image is also imported from.

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How to Get Good at Life

“Getting good at change (big, small, tiny – every day) means getting good at life” – James Altucher.

Pessimist and Optimist vs Change
Churchill’s view of Change

Life is all about managing change. We change every day since we are born, and the world changes every day around us.

Let’s try to get good at change instead of trying to stick to illusory stability.

It can be scary at times, but so much more rewarding.

Change is pure opportunity.

 

 

“Do it without expectation. Wish for nothing. Care for everything. Happiness will be in between.”

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How to Unleash the Power of Connectional Intelligence

“In our new world of an embedded digital infrastructure that connects all of our lives, the power of connectional intelligence holds exponential, and previously untapped, potential for breakthroughs in ways we can barely begin to imagine” writes Saj-Nicole Joni in ‘Win Big by Unleashing Millennials’ Connective Intelligence‘.

Multicolored plugsShe continues “Connectional intelligence is your ability to make breakthroughs by connecting ideas, people, information, and resources. You use CxQ whenever you sift through multiple sources of information to put pieces of a puzzling problem together in new ways. It’s in your ability to build and realize value from networks of relationships, in your ability to convene communities, to marshal a various of resources to focus on a result, and to make diversity and differences productive.”. According to her, people with high connectional intelligence have always existed – but now it is much easier and much more widespread than ever before.

So, how much do you develop and exploit your connectional intelligence in your daily practice? If you do not – at least consciously – it looks like a good time to go at it – and enter the Fourth Revolution world in a more active way!

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How to Overcome the Greatest Problem in Communication

“The greatest problem in communication is the illusion that it has been accomplished” – George Bernard Shaw.

Poor communicationI can observe every day in my consulting practice how this old quote is so true, in particular in large organizations. Top management often confuses the act of communicating with actual communication.

It takes a lot of effort and caring to ensure proper communication. That means actual, down-to-earth leadership, and consistency through time.

I like to think that this issue can be solve through enough caring: what is communication if you don’t care about how well the message has been received and understood? It is about acknowledging the emotional component and be emphatic to the actual reception.

Be open and listen actively to assess the result of your communication. Don’t just deliver a message: observe its effect and ensure ‘after-sales’ service in the form of emphatic listening!

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Where to Find Meaning in Life

According to Viktor Frankl, the author of  ‘Man’s Search for Meaning‘ (ref. our post ‘How We Always Have a Choice, Even in the Worst Situation‘), there are three possible positive sources of Meaning: in Work (doing something significant), in Love (caring for another person), and in Courage during difficult times.

life meaningAs we evolve in life, the source where we seek out meaning might evolve and change. The overall meaning of our life will only make sense at the very end. “We cannot understand the whole film without having first understood each of its components, each of the individual pictures. Isn’t it the same with life? Doesn’t the final meaning of life, too, reveal itself, if at all, only at its end, on the verge of death? And doesn’t this final meaning, too, depend on whether or not the potential meaning of each single situation has been actualized to the best of the respective individual’s knowledge and belief?”

Notwithstanding that it will all make sense at the end and not before, are you doing your best finding meaning in a meaningful work, love for another person or courage facing a difficult situation?

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What is Perfectionism and How to Overcome It

Some would say I am a recovering perfectionist (while I do not really feel that way). I can certainly be very detailed-oriented but can now also let go and ship to the world even if I know it is not perfect. What maybe I did not understand well was the mechanism of perfectionism.

Brene Brown on PerfectionismI found a great summary of this issue in an excellent book I read recently. “Perfectionism is a self-destructive and addictive belief system that fuels this primary thought: If I look perfect, live perfectly, and do everything perfectly, I can avoid or minimize the painful feelings of shame, judgment, and blame. Perfectionism is self-destructive simply because there is no such thing as perfect” – so writes Brene Brown in the Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are (she is an academic researcher on blame and became a best-selling author on the topic of becoming what we really are).

What she points out is that perfectionism is in fact an addiction that aims to protect us from the outside world – and thus could be compared to alcohol or drugs somehow. Overcoming perfectionism also requires the same tools and habit-forming activities than other addictions, and possibly external help as well.

Being careful in what you are doing is fine. But if you overextend it because you fear what people might think of you, and then you don’t come out to the world, you might suffer from an addiction to perfectionism. Heal yourself!

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What is True Mastery?

“True mastery comes from discovering the ‘simplicity’ on the other side of complexity” – Dan Ward.

Dan Ward Simplicity CycleDan Ward is an interesting phenomenon – senior purchaser with the US Air Force he is also a prolific writer on the topic of complexity. The Simplicity Cycle is a great piece of thought – here is the link to the Simplicity Cycle Paper or alternatively, the Simplicity Cycle slideshow.

He has an interesting take on the fact that development of a great item needs to initially start with increasing complexity – but that after some stage it needs to migrate to the search for simplicity – and that otherwise goodness decreases with increasing complexity.

“Perfection [in design] is achieved not when there is something more to add, but rather when there is nothing more to take away” – Eric Raymond. A great definition of the Graal of design and of the evolution of any system. And a great definition Mastery: one who knows how to simplify the complex can increase significantly its impact on the world!

Hat tip to Tony Farrow for the link to Dan Ward’s work.

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Why You Should Become Better at Change… by Practicing Change

“Getting good at change (big, small, tiny – every day) means getting good at life” writes James Altucher in this excellent post.

LifeChangeWe certainly all need to become better at taking change as an opportunity rather than a threat. Change is actually always quite good in terms of excitement and learning. “When you change you go from a flattening learning curve (your old situation) to a steep learning curve (the new situation). Steep learning curves feel good. Like the feeling of new love.”

Of course, changes are not always ignited by us; they can be the result of external forces we don’t control. Sometimes one reason we suffer too much is because we’ve become rusty at change, because we don’t practice enough; we have become too sedentary in our habits. One key secret is probably to exercise at change by changing often. By becoming a nomad of sorts when it comes to our habits. We can exercise this very well by travelling; by relocating elsewhere; and by trying to change our habits and activities often.

A final word from James Altucher: “[Change] without expectation. Wish for nothing. Care for everything. Happiness will be in between“.

Go for it!

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How to Achieve Success

To achieve success, don’t aim at success!

missed targetThat is essentially what Viktor Frankl (author of  ‘Man’s Search for Meaning‘) advises. Achieve success by not thinking about success but putting in the hard work, dedication and commitment that is necessary to achieve great things.

“Don’t aim at success – the more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side-effect of one’s dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one’s surrender to a person other than oneself. Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it“.

And it is very true in my personal experience: every time I have been very successful, it was when I was concentrating on doing my best work independently of any thought about success and how people would judge me.

Are you concentrating on doing your best work instead of thinking how to achieve success?

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Why Procrastination is Useful (Sometimes)

In this blog we have written often about the concept of Resistance and how to overcome it. Overcoming resistance is beating procrastination. But maybe procrastination is not such a bad thing, after all, at least sometimes.

Now vs LaterThat’s at least what James Altucher suggests in his book ‘Choose Yourself‘: “Procrastination is your body telling you that you need to back off a bit and think more about what you are doing“.

After reflection, I believe this is true in some instances, in particular when it comes to a creative endeavor. Sometimes we procrastinate because the meaning or the objective of what we intend to do is unclear, and then, in that case, it might be worth thinking twice before undertaking our project. When we are fully motivated, procrastination never appears.

Remains the issue of chores and those things we need to do but are not particularly pleasant. In that case, procrastination is obviously an issue.

It is important to distinguish between chores and creative endeavors. If on a creative endeavor, procrastination appears, ask yourself if what you are doing is the right thing to do!

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